i've considered myself invincible on many levels. i'm invincible because i do not feel or rather, the feeling doesn't not linger with the memory and the memory is as present to me as a beautiful film that i no longer carry the patience to see. like atonement. i shook and held myself back through that film, never shedding a tear. the thought of the ending affects me like a magical sentence, the words are so beautiful that they linger with me, but in a sense that i can only wish for those feelings again. and i get them, for the present, at the present, but as time and people fade and no longer become a staple, i become detached and lose them to a memory that does not occur to me as reality. but is this invincibility or is this a bulletproof defense mechanism?
